I Wonder...

I knew for sure that...I would wake up this morning.
I never knew...being a mother would be so challenging.
I was so certain...once I graduated from nursing school, life would ease up.
If I only realized...how much Jesus really loves me I'd be so much more faithful and obedient.
I wish I understood...why God continues to be so incredibly good to me, regaurdless the pitfalls I place myself in.

Kissy Kiss

This evening, in effort of being the "cool" mom I think I am, I allowed my 2 children to stay up past their bedtime this Friday night. Not knowing what was good for me (as always), I was faced with carrying my 6 year old daughter up the stairs and into her bed. It's been a while since doing this, I must add that she is not a light load. I managed fine though, only once bumped her head (slightly) on the stair rail, and her feet on the door. As she lay asleep, undisturbed in her bed, I bent down to kiss her cheek. It was so precious. I'll admit there was much emotion backing the sweet peck I'd placed. Through my mind the thought played, "what if this was this kiss was the last kiss I could give her". It was then that I thought about the essence of a kiss. Why is it when we kiss that we suck in and produce a smacking sound with our lips? If we don't make the  kissy sound is the kiss still as kiss? I wonder if I'm cheating if I just let my lips touch, say my grandmothers face. Of course its not. What was I thinking. I guess in life kissing becomes one of those things we just do, without thinking. Unless of course it's a new subject that we're kissing. Wonder who first came up with it. Why not simply rub elbows or touch ears. Nonetheless, I like kissing, and I love Amya as well.

An Observation

Firetrucks and ambulances are like apples: they both come in either red or greenish yellow.
 

Air Max 2010's

A part of one of my closets

Last night in the Emergency Room we were swamped.
We received medic after medic with patients complaining of  chest pain, trouble breathing, seizures and suicide attempts.Several of the patients in the waiting room were currently vomiting into their emesis basins, others had their bodies shrewn out over the lobby furnature, ill and uncomfortable enough to neglect self dignity and modesty. I noted a female 13 weeks pregnant with twins was experiencing heavy vaginal bleeding. An  active miscarriage was evident. Just then, I heard our ambulance radio alarm with another medic encoding. This patient was assigned to me before arrival. I was instructed to prepare the trauma bay for a pt in acute respiratory distress. Being the primary nurse in situations such as this is challenging, yet rewarding. I immediately called pharmacy to stand by in the event of a Code Blue, as well as respiratory therapy due to the fact that the medics en route  report my patient's blood oxygen level is below 50% out of 100%. I delegate other nurses and techs to start additional IV's,get an EKG and connect monitoring equiptment. Before long my patient was stabilizing and arrangements were being made for me to transfer the patient to another hospital in the area. As I scurried around collecting paperwork and supplies to manage my patient's care, I could hear a biligerant young man screaming out violently. I purposefully walked past the glass sliding door of his room to sneek a closer peak. This intoxicated gentleman had been involved in an alceration and was bloodied from head to toe. He was uttering out curse words, swearing at who ever walked by, threatening us, and demanding us not to touch him and to leave him alone. Eventually physical restraints were ordered for the patient. In my mind, the first thing I noticed about this patient were the yellow and gray, brand new Air Max 2010's on his feet, splattered with blood. Gosh darn those were nice sneakers

Strange

In the recent past I've caught multiple awe inspiring thoughts rushing through my mind. For the past few years, when a "good one" cycles through I usually grab the nearest writing utensil and scribble down my idea on the corner of a bill or a receipt. Now, I'm not the most organized individual, so don't anticipate a top selling novel/collection of spontaneous and stimulating thoughts in the near future. Anyways, so I was leafing through a stack of old papers and happened to find the words "slanted room" scribbled down. Instantly I remembered when and why I wrote "slanted room". It was about 8 months ago I had a dream. In the dream I was in my old apartment. Some how, some way I discovered a totally new room in my apartment that I never knew  was there. When I stepped into the "new" room I gained the sensation that the floor was severely slanted. As I carefully walked across the floor, I felt as if I were walking down a hill on a balancing beam. This is all I remember about the dream. Actually I forgot that I'd ever had the dream. The most eerie thing about this dream is that  back in May I moved into a new town house. I didn't notice initially, but the floor of my new place slants downwards, throughout the whole home, but especially entering the den through the kitchen. Typically a comment I often get from new visitors is "wow...It kinda feels like I'm walking down hill towards the back". I, just now this evening,  experienced an epiphenomena in that I remembered the dream from the scribbled note I wrote on the paper also, I can not deny the fact that my home does have a downward slant, exactly like I dreamed about beforehand...strange.

Fact

My greatest weakness is that I have a high tolerance for B.S.

Truth

My greatest strength is that I have a high tolerance for B.S.

Question

If a person knows that they are in denial, are they in denial anymore?